Monday, February 26, 2024

15 Things No One Tells You Before Getting a Dog

If you’ve been around dogs your whole life you already know how weird they are are. But if you’re new to the world of being a dog owner there’s a few things that will surprise you. Here’s some of the weird things no one tells you before getting a dog.

1. Dogs Eat Their Own Vomit

After your dog throws up be sure to clean it up right away. If not you’ll get to witness the joy that is watching your dog eat their own vomit. Eating vomit for dogs isn’t weird or gross; it’s natural behavior. Dog moms regurgitate food for their pups to help them get used to eating solid foods. When dogs see vomit they don’t think ‘eww, that’s gross,’ they smell food.

2. They Go Insane After a Bath

Bathing your dog is going to be part of your normal routine, but there’s nothing routine about what happen to dog afterwards. Be warned; dogs go crazy after a bath. Not in an aggressive or scary way, but in a running around the house and jumping on all of the things sort of way. It’s called the zoomies, and it’s a way for dogs to get rid of pent up energy. If your dog gets the zoomies after a bath don’t panic; it’s normal (dogs are weird).

3. They Love Rolling in Stinky Stuff

Your dog will find it hard to resist the urge to roll in all of the smelly things they encounter. A pile of dead fish, horse poop, a pool of some unknown substance on the ground – to your dog they’re all perfect for rolling in.

No one knows exactly why our dogs love to roll in stinky things, but there are a few theories. The first is that they like the smell and want to wear it like perfume, proudly showing off that lovely dead rat smell. The second is that they’re using those smells to camouflage their own scent. And the third is that they’re trying to bring back information via scent to the pack.

If your dog stops to sniff something on the ground be ready for them to make that big decision – should I roll in this or pee on it?

4. They Love Peeing on All of The Things

Like the love they have for rolling in stinky stuff, our dogs find it hard to resist the urge to pee on all of the things. Your dog will pee on a variety items when you’re out walking him. It’s a communicative behavior for them, and dogs are able to get information about other dogs by sniffing their urine. (such as whether or not a dog is in heat or how long it’s been since the dog passed through the area)

And peeing on all of the things isn’t just a male thing either; some female dogs mark just as much as the boys. And as I mentioned above if your dog stops to sniff something be prepared for them to either pee on it or roll in it.

5. Dogs Don’t Like Their Routines Disturbed

If you get up during the week 6am and try sleeping in til 10 on the weekends your dog might may have other plans. They love their routines, and many dogs aren’t shy about waking you up if you sleep longer than they deem necessary. Laika gets cranky if I’m not up by 9am. At 9:01 she starts whining in my face, and if that doesn’t work the pawing begins.

6. They Become Poop Machines on Walks

If you’re going out for a walk with your dog you might feel safe with a poop bag or two. I suggest taking five. Every day I walk Laika around the yard for 10 minutes before our walk, trying to get her to poop before our walk. It doesn’t work, it never works (why I keep trying is beyond me). But as soon as we’re 100 feet down the street it’s go time.

7. They’re Sloppy Around the Food Bowl

There’s a reason people place rubber mats under their dog’s water dish – dogs are sloppy. Not every dog is a complete mess with food & water, but it’s certainly not uncommon. Laika’s neat with her food, but a complete slob with water. I can tell by the 30 foot trail of dribble she leaves behind.

8. Dog Feet Smell Like Corn Chips

Smell your dog’s feet. No seriously, go do it. Do they smell like corn chips or popcorn? If so don’t worry, it’s just “frito feet” and it’s completely normal (as I said, dogs are weird). Our dogs sweat through their paws, and the bacteria that collects lets off a corn chip type smell. I find it endearing (don’t judge), but if you’re not a fan you can wash your dogs paws when they start smelling like corn chips.

9. They Lick Their Genitals All The Time

Having family over for dinner? Get ready for your dog to pop down in front of everyone and start licking their genitals. Quite a conversation starter, isn’t it? Although a bit awkward, moderate genital licking is considered normal grooming behavior. (If your dog is licking more than normal take a trip to the vet to rule out any medical issues)

10. Dog Hair Gets Everywhere

You may think that just because your dog has short hair you won’t have to worry about shedding; well that’s very optimistic of you. Unfortunately almost all dogs shed. Be prepared to find dog hair in your oven, on your mirror and in your pockets. It’s going to get everywhere. If you’re feeling overwhelmed there are some nifty hacks that help pick up all that loose fur.

11. They’re Really Good at Understanding Us

Don’t be creeped out if you catch your dog staring at you; observing us is a big part of what they do. They watch us, and they know our routines just as well as we do. They know when it’s time for you to go to work, when it’s time to eat, and when it’s time to go for a walk – and they’ll respond accordingly.

12. Dogs Come With Horrible Manners

You know that you have to potty train your puppy, that’s a given. But you also have to teach them not to bite all of the things, not to jump on all of the things, not to destroy all the things, and not to be a jerk to all of the things. It’s exhausting. And it’s easy to assume that dogs come with decent manners since most of the adult dogs we meet are pretty chill. Nothing could be further from the truth. You’re going to have to spend a lot of time training your new pup to develop good manners.

13. They Will Drink From the Toilet

There’s one sound you’ll get used to pretty quick when you get a dog – the horrifying sound of your dog drinking from the toilet. It’s gross, but to them it makes perfect sense. It’s a never ending supply of fresh water (it’s stays nice and cool, too). Dogs tend to avoid stagnant water since it’s more likely to be contaminated. So when given the choice between water that’s been sitting in their bowl for hours or the toilet they’ll opt for the latter.

14. Dogs Chase & Eat Bugs

Some dogs will chase anything that moves – including bugs. Laika will stop whatever she’s doing if she hears a fly. And when we’re out on a walk she’ll snap at anything that comes near her face. Some of it’s probably due to annoyance (I don’t like that buzzing sound, either), but I suspect most of it is because a moving target is always fun to chase.

15. They Get Bored With Their Toys

Just like us our dogs get bored with the same old things. That awesome blue ball they got a few months ago? Not quite as exciting anymore. To keep your dog interested in their toys try rotating them. Give them access to a few toys at a time, and switch them up every week. And to make them even more exciting try playing some interactive games. As soon as you start to play with their toy it makes it the most interesting thing in the world again.